It’s important to remember that perfectionism is the enemy of creativity, and at a basic level human beings are creative beings. Everything you experience is created by you, for you!
Authenticity is the source of the magic in creation; whether it’s a status update or a piece of copywriting.
Factors such as stimuli, nutrition, clutter, and hydration have a significant impact on my writing because a balanced world has room for self-belief.
When we are stretched, self belief seems to be the first element we offline.
Confidence is vulnerable to the effects of imbalance in our world. Mine seems to rise and fall in sync with my appetite – apparently, my world is balanced when I have a full belly.
Caring for your inner child is helpful because accessing the curious, energetic thirst for learning will have your being infused with the magic of authenticity.
As children, we seek to understand our world through exploration, not at all worried about something as trivial as logic.
It’s what we call learning as an adult.
The great news is that your inner child is eager to learn at any age and I have put together this list of techniques that are all part of my regular self-care.
With a little practice you will be able to find joy in everything you do!
Spoiler alert: Not a single one of them requires money!
10 Rules For Confidence Your Inner Child Will Love
Cut yourself some slack
Very few, hopefully, none of us actually want to make our lives more complicated. Life is a series of challenges that we face and we all make what we consider to be the best decision considering the information available to us up until that point.
The truth is that you are going to make choices that don’t have the best of consequences. Life is an evolution, so cut yourself some slack by allowing yourself to take time to learn. As long as you are not breaking any laws or intentionally hurting yourself or others, you’re good.
Look for the lesson in everything
In each of those choices that don’t work out particularly well, there is a lesson to be learned that will help you to grow as a person.
Humans have a cognitive bias which makes us ‘see’ negative things more than positive so we get caught up what we call a mistake and end up losing the lesson, which means we will almost certainly make that mistake again.
Nature makes everything okay, so immersing ourselves in our natural habitat (which is not brick houses with wifi boosters or apartments with balconies, just saying) we are able to find balance. Get out for a walk and leave the phone at home for thirty minutes, just think of all the notifications when you get back!
Science is the process of understanding what already exists in nature, so when a scientific replication of natural things occurs; should it encounter a problem, the first reponse will always be to look to nature for a solution. That can’t be argued with.
Stop worrying about your ‘aesthetic’
Nobody cares what you look like. This is not meant in a shady ‘you don’t matter’ way; you matter very much – the real you that is.
If you get boundless joy from making sure your hair is lovely, your body is whatever shape you want it to be and your ensemble is red carpet ready then great…
If you’re doing a thing for external validation, you’re playing yourself, so stop!
Stick to one promise a day, and fulfil it with purpose
Don’t beat yourself with a stick of your own design by trying to cram everything into one day. It’s useful to use a calendar to chart the things that have to be done every day: exercise, dog walk, lunch, reading, and whatever else you do. This is your routine.
Above and beyond this make yourself one promise of a thing you are going to do. Then, do that really well and provide yourself with a treat after doing so.
Understand that joy is not a product that can be bought
I’m not talking about the rush of buying a beautiful thing, in fact, I love beautiful things so much my family call me a Magpie.
It is important to not mix this feeling up with those moments in life when we are smiling with a big, toothy smile of pure happiness.
These are the moments in life that are usually completely unplanned, resulting in a spontaneous reaction of joy. These are also more likely to become what we call memories, rather than a sensation of fleeting gratification.
Do something nice for someone else
Self Esteem is the result of doing estimable acts (esteemable for none UK readers), and humans have inbuilt quality control that knows whether we are doing a thing as a performance, or with integrity.
We can literally only feel good about ourselves if we do nice things for others, without expecting recognition for it.
Practice saying “No” and not “No because…”
Justification has become an expectation, and an expectation is a preconceived resentment. Obviously, there are some caveats to this one; I don’t mean that we can refuse to go to school or work without an explanation.
What I do mean is that if a friend asks you to go the bar, you can just say “No.” even though it will be awkward the first few times you do this, you will be amazed at how quickly it takes hold.
If we could pay bills in judgment there would be no debt in the world; but judgment, of self or others, actually creates a vacuum that is filled with shame, self-loathing, or insecurity.
By choosing to remove the burden of the judgment of others from yourself, you free yourself from the opposite reaction of being judged.
Understand that you don’t have to disprove a ‘thing’ for it to be wrong
Cancel culture is so damaging and it took me a long time, and a lot of energy wasted, to learn that I could be right about something without proving someone else wrong.
So next time you know something and someone else has a different point of view, seek to understand them. In doing so, you may learn something new.